A five star hotel so fabulous you and your kids will never want to leave. Pack your bags, Coworth Park is calling for fresh air, great food and fun on tap.

Arrrrgh. How is it half term already? It feels like it was only yesterday we were clicking our heels at the school gates as we sent our kids back to the classroom. But the holidays are upon us and, to be honest, as we hurtle towards Christmas, we’ll take any opportunity we can to step off the treadmill of daily school runs, talk of bubbles and WFH Zoom calls. I know just the place.

How does a little five star R&R grab you? A place where children and adults are entertained, your every whim is catered for and there’s no compromise needed. Where is this utopia, you ask? Canter towards Ascot and head down the sweeping drive of Coworth Park. It is the ultimate staycation destination for quality family time. Here’s why we’re hot footing it here right now…

1/ FRESH AIR FUN

Ditch the digital nanny for a bit, because there’s a 240-acre playground. If there’s one thing I love about Coworth Park, it’s the emphasis on wellbeing – making the most the countryside location and fresh air. So what’s on offer? Stunning parkland, an equestrian centre, polo fields, kids’ club, tennis courts designated children’s hours at the pool and plenty of outdoor fun. 

Explore the estate on foot, be it a slow amble or an enthusiastic jog. There are bikes available to use – I’m feeling the retro basket bike, major eye rolls for my kids as it might as well be a Penny Farthing. They also have mountain bikes for kids claiming to maintain their street cred.

Plus, if you are a competent horse rider, slip into your jodhpurs and hack out. Coworth Park has a first class equestrian centre and it’s the only five star hotel to have its only polo club. If you’re an avid royal watcher, pre-Megzit, Prince Harry was a regular polo club. Nearby you can also drink in Berkshire’s stonking scenery, cultural gems and heritage sites.

2/ NO PARENTS ALLOWED

Music to every parent’s ears… especially if you know there’s no chance of your kids getting up to no good. Coworth Park Kids is like Willy Wonka’s factory of fun – eight rooms, including a teen den, where your little people rule the roost. Coworth Park has transformed an entire house (seven play rooms) for kids to play, bake, build and chill out.

Let’s be honest, cooking with kids, painting and messy play can end in tears at home (mine, usually), so take the opportunity to let your kids to go crazy with the crafting right here. The saints running this place love getting their hands dirty. Even hard-to-please, grunting teens enjoy hanging out here – anything to get away from their embarrassing family to play table football, air hockey, watch a movie or hit the game consoles. 

3/ FEEDING FRENZY

Food glorious food. This is a foodie destination for galloping gourmets and all mini Grace Dents and Giles Corens. The Michelin star restaurant is a stellar booking for you, but perhaps isn’t going to hit the spot for your offspring who think a fish goujon is the height of culinary chic (just mine?). Panic not, The Barn is a more relaxed vibe than Restaurant Coworth Park, where muddy boots and rampaging kids are welcomed with open arms. Nothing stuffy here, just great nosh and the peace of mind that there will be something even the fussiest eaters will enjoy. 

Also, poise those pinkies and do not leave until you have sunk your teeth into the hotel’s award-winning afternoon tea. An army of solider sarnies and precision pastries with a tea and champers on tap. Although we’ve got our eye on the bottle of bubbly. You can also request a simple tea for your children, so they can enjoy this very British tradition without all the foodie frills. 

4/ LAW OF ATTRACTIONS

It’s all about location, location, location and it doesn’t get better than this. On your doorstep you’ve got Windsor Castle (currently showcasing Princess Beatrice’s wedding dress until 24 Nov), Legoland Windsor and Thorpe Park. Go aaaaaargh at Swinley Forest and swing through the tree top at Go Ape. Younger kids will love Wellington Country Park – farm animals, miniature train, dinosaurs and a fantastic adventure playground. If you’re itching to give your credit card a battering, whizz into Windsor’s Royal Arcade. Alternatively Bicester Village is just over an hour away and well worth a visit. For vintage finds, Thames Hospice in Windsor is a treasure trove of designer gear and a hidden gem. Keep that one between us, it can be a treasure trove of vintage designer gear.

5/ SIT THIS ONE OUT

We all love our children, but some sanity-saving quality time out is essential. If you’re a long way from the babysitter you have on speed dial, book up a Coworth Park sitter.

Fancy a romantic evening in the restaurant or time to unwind in the spa? Sorted. Book a minimum of four hours, then eat, sleep, spa, repeat and leave the pros and their laser-trained eyes to keep them entertained either on the estate or whisk at nearby attractions like Legoland Windsor or Thorpe Park. Expect to pay £60 for two kids for four hours; £80 for three to four children, which I think is pretty reasonable for that length of time.

Book a room at Coworth Park from £430 inc VAT, per room per night available midweek throughout November and December.